The Trip - Dec 2009

So here I am. I went on a little multi-city tour this winter break and I find myself reflecting on my time. I did many things, thought many things, and realized many things. One of my realizations was that my blog has probably become more and more cryptic and abstract and difficult to understand. The possible reasons are that I am scared to write about how I feel in a way that people will actually understand how I feel, and another reason is that I like to believe that what I write need not be public; that is as long as I understand what I write I couldn't care less. But I guess I do need to communicate and hence this post is going to be an attempt at honest and simple sharing. So read on...

I went to Boston-Burlington-Baltimore. Interestingly all Bs. I in fact had made a decision once upon a time that I will do a bike (cycle) tour to all towns and cities in India that start with B. Quite an irrelevant piece of information. Well, I had an excellent time on this trip meeting family and friends and having time for myself.

First is a list of things that sum up my trip

1. Slept in a fetal position in the 18 hour train journey from Toledo to Boston. But also sat in the cafe car for most of the time, looking out of the window.
2. Met Alex in the cafe car where we talked about how he faces discrimination because of his dreadlocks even though he is white.
3. Had a conversation about open spaces and common land in Australia with an old Australian couple, an environmental science student, and a physics student.
4. Spilled a whole embarrassing cup of coffee on myself. Thermals saved me from getting a skin burn.
5. Drove around Boston, walked through Harvard and saw some MIT buildings.
6. Met a family comprising of a white man, woman from India, and two adopted girls from India.
7. Sat through the most amazing drive between Boston and Burlington.
8. Ate good food and drank red wine everywhere
9. Sat through 3 christmas parties
10. Met long lost cousins and uncles
11. Rode the red line in Boston (metro)
12. Made friends with Ace who I never touched. (the cat)
13. Understood what it feels like to be told I drink wine too fast and that I drink win too slow.
14. Did a lot of futile research for Philadelphia.
15. Slept through new year at Baltimore
16. Said nothing to anybody on the train back to Toledo

And now somethings I learned, re-learned, realized etc.

I figured it is okay to be restless and unsure about the future because there are so many attractive options and also it motivates me to get work done on time. I shouldn't take things too seriously sometimes.

I was reminded about the wonderful friends I have. Some of my friendships are stronger than my family ties. I am so grateful for them. I will continue to create and keep deep friendships regardless of what people have to say about relationships only being shallow in 'real' life. I am what I am, a caring, loyal, and loving friend. Also brutal, honest, and playful. I can be all this only to few and I am glad and grateful to my friends for allowing me to be all this.

Philosophically I need to be honest with myself about my own beliefs. I realize that I am constantly growing and changing. I should trust my experiences.

I can and will never be a part of any group or gang. I would not want to even if I was and so I should stop trying and instead cherish my friendships.

Toledo is a learning and training ground for me. It is teaching me to be independent, interdependent, and knowledgeable.

My family continues to be my biggest support at all times and I cannot be thankful enough.

So, it has been a fruitful trip and I hope to make such trips regularly throughout my life.